Mercury, the planet of communication enters its three
times a year retrograde stage on May 6, 2009 and will remain
in a backward momentum, as it were, until May 30, 2009.

Mercury in retrograde has a very bad rap. I should know.
As a Virgo (which is ruled by Mercury) I am usually affected
quite profoundly. But over the years I have learned a thing
or two about how to survive in one piece, and how to use
this potentially frustrating phase in a fruitful manner.

When Mercury is moving direct, our minds tend to work on a
functional/forward level. Our actions match our intentions. Our
energy is invested in more assertive decision-making and action
with less emphasis on retrospection and reflection.

However, we are constantly picking up on unconscious intuitive
information, which will surface -- if we let it -- during the
retrograde cycle. And this is a very good thing. We need time to
rest and assimilation all the information that we are bombarded
with in our techno, multitasking world. A time for our inner wisdom
to manifest and guide us to reorganize, rethink, reevaluate, redo,
and reboot. This is a crucial and healthy part of the organic, natural
flow of life.

The clock and dollar orientation that our culture calls *the real
world* is comprised of schedules, deadlines, and to do lists,
which don't often accommodate a cycle of introspective reflection
and reevaluation. This is why this period can be so brutal for some of
us -- especially those of us with determined steely goals and agendas.

Mercury, as most of us know, tends to play havoc with the smooth
functioning of the technology upon which we depend for our
achievements and communication. It also tends to mix up face to face
communications and the best laid plans of wo/men. The results are
interruptions, snafus, misunderstandings, and mix-ups which interfere
with the simplest of projects.

During Mercury in Retrograde, we will need more caution, more
care, and a pinch more elbow grease to get things done. This is
not a good time to launch or initiate new projects. In trying to do so,
we will be pushing off, symbolically, just when the tide is going out,
and it will be more of a struggle to make headway with our plans. It
is far better to wait until the current is moving with us.

The degree to which we hold onto our need to keep to our schedules,
agendas, and plans often equates to the degree in which we find
ourselves going bonkers during this time. When we doggedly hold on
to our logical, rational structures, we court the *Trickster* element
of Mercury, which will fool and frustrate us to no end.

Now is the time that we must surrender our forward leaning push and
embrace the lessons of letting go. We must not underestimate the
degree to which our psyche can resist change. The abdication of our
will/ego to a deeper function of consciousness can be quite a challenge
as the retrograde cycle continues. But there is great reward if we
manage to do so.

This period is a great time to clear our minds. To go back and
complete unfinished projects. To work on reconciling old issues. To
tune into our dreams and unconscious thoughts. To listen to our
inner wisdom. To open to new ways of thinking and perceiving.

So rather than pushing against the cosmic current, let's take a
three week break from our hectic, breakneck speedy ways and
allow ourselves to slow down. To summon up and sort out the
past. To be in the moment. And to savor the NOW.

It can't hurt!

Best blessings of sanity,

XxQMD

I killed another bird this week. That is to say, that I rescued an injured bird two weeks ago that I was not able to prevent from dying. Again. I do this every spring. Somehow every year I find a fallen baby bird. I take it home and nurse it, but the results are rarely good. On occasion I have raised one to the point when it can fly off on its own. But usually, the ending is not so happy.

In this case, it was a young pigeon still with some baby fuzz and fluffy rust-colored pinfeathers. You never see baby pigeons. The parents keep them totally out of sight until they can be independent. But here was one sitting on the pavement of the parking lot of my building. I had to move it, or it would have been run over. I could have just put it into some bushes, but it surely would have been eaten by the marauding night cats,

I noticed that it had a head wound and also a few on its chest. It had fallen from one of the ledges on the building where pigeons roost. It was very still, perhaps in shock, and let me pick it up. I took it home and cleaned its wounds with peroxide and put it in a box. I tended the cuts and abrasions often, and after a couple of days they were healed.

It became more alert and clearly stronger. The next thing was to feed it. But it refused the gruel that I made from pulverized cat food — the recommended food for baby birds. About five days passed with no food or water. And yet it kept getting better and better. Animals don’t eat when they are sick or injured, so I didn’t force-feed it.

Then I offered it some seeds and he pecked t them. Yea! I took the box outside onto my terrace. He (familiarity changed him from an it to a he) immediately discovered the pan of water that I keep out there for the birds and climbed in. He drank and waded, then pecked some more. Victory!

This went on for days. We had a routine. I took him in at night and covered the box with a dark cloth and then took him outside into the sunshine each day. He walked further and further everyday, exploring, pecking, flapping his wings. But he loved his box and spent most of his time nesting.

Poppy, my little dog was fascinated by him and followed him around. And visa versa. They bonded with each other and I am not sure who imprinted on whom. But they were a team. This was definitely Poppy’s pigeon. She had just had her fifth birthday and I couldn’t have gotten her a better or more beloved present.

All went well. He liked coming into the house and I would usher him back out, not wanting pigeon poop all over. One day I found him in my office. I picked him up and took him back outside. I threw him up a bit and he flew a little. So now it was just a matter of time and he would soon fly away into his adult life.

Two days ago I drank my morning tea on the terrace enjoying the dog and pigeon show. I needed to change clothes to go to the gym and called the dog inside and closed the door. But the two little lovers each ran to the glass door, trying to reach each other through the panes. So I let Poppy back out.

My fatal mistake. A stupid misjudgment. An idiotic lapse of vigilance.

I changed and when I came out to the terrace the bird was dead on the floor and Poppy was cowering under a chair. I couldn’t believe it. Poppy killed her pigeon. She did the deed but the blood is on my hands. It was totally my fault and the guilt is tormenting me. I was furious with her, but much angrier with myself. How could I have let this happen?

Poppy is devastated. Not by guilt. She doesn’t understand what happened, but by grief. She misses the bird and keeps looking for it. I don’t believe it was animal killer instinct. She is not a killer, but a Papillion/Shitzu mix, a lapdog breed. She literally loved him to death.

And I guess that is what I do. I mean well. I want to help, to heal, to rescue, to save, to love all life into health and happiness. And I always succeed, but just to a point and then something happens. I make a mistake of some sort and all is lost.

So what is the lesson? And when will I learn it? They say that one shouldn’t interfere with Nature. But aren’t we all part of Nature? Isn’t it up to each of us to try to save and heal each other? I don’t know the answer. But I do know that I will probably do it again. That is my nature.

Best blessings of healing,

xxQMD